---
title: 'The power of "Not Now"'
url: 'https://tonypiper.coach/articles/the-power-of-not-now'
date: '2019-08-07'
updated: '2025-01-01'
author: 'Tony Piper'
description: 'Are you a people pleaser heading for burnout? Learn how saying "not now" instead of "yes" can protect your time and energy.'
tags:
  - Wellbeing
  - 'Personal Growth'
---



     ![A book cover features a blue sky backdrop with white clouds below. The title "THE POWER OF NOT NOW" is prominently displayed in bold white letters, along with the subtitle "How to stop being a people pleaser and take control of your life." The author's name, Tony Piper, is positioned at the bottom.](https://tonypiper.coach/cdn-cgi/image/format=auto,width=1024,height=1024,fit=crop,gravity=auto,quality=85/images/inshot_20190807_101338036.jpg?v=1733510517) 

# The power of "Not Now"

By Tony Piper,  August 7, 2019 •  [Wellbeing](https://tonypiper.coach/tags/wellbeing) [Personal Growth](https://tonypiper.coach/tags/personal-growth) 

Are you a people pleaser who is in danger of burning out? If so, you need to read my latest book.

OK, I haven't written the book. Yet.

But if I did, I might call it 'The Power of Not Now' (inspired by Eckhart Tolle).

People pleasers often burn out because they can't say no. It goes against every instinct they have to be helpful to others.

So they say yes. And get overwhelmed.

What would happen if instead of saying 'yes', you said 'not now'?

It would still give you the option to be helpful.

But would give you control of your time.

In an earlier post, I wrote about the difference between expectation and agreement.

When someone asks us to do something, we often have an expectation that they want it now. So we try and do it now.

Saying 'not now' opens up the conversation to explore the possibilities of 'what' and by 'when'. And you can therefore reach an agreement.

Try it. Let me know how you get on.